Kate Moss Acknowledges Drug Use
By falling down, retching her guts out and babbling incoherently
North Korea Pledges to Drop Nuke Programs
Targets of these multi-megaton "programs" not revealed
IBM to Encourage Employees to Be Teachers
Company then plans to lower their salaries accordingly
Smoking Plus Beta-Carotene May Up Cancer Odds
People urged not to smoke carrots
Men, Women May Both Be From Mars
Unless they are Democrats, then they are from Uranus
Plague-Infected Mice Missing From N.J. Lab
Feds begin massive hunt for Pinky and The Brain
First Lady Tackles Poverty, Race Issues
Poverty thrown for loss, faces 4th and long, likely to punt
Katrina's official deaths top 1,000
Nagin still looking for 9300 bodies in New Orleans
Many Islands "Gone," Wetlands Gutted After Katrina, Experts Say
Looters claimed they needed islands and wetlands to survive
Mars getting warmer, may have quakes
Bush blamed for not signing Kyoto-Terra Meridiani accords
That's it for Headlines today. Remember to visit the usual suspects, basil, Moe, moehawk, The Capitalist and NOW also check out Eyes on the Ball News for more headliney goodness!
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