Thursday Thirteen #16
13 things about Dane Bramage
The 13 Things I Hate About My Sleep Study
Tonight I go in to the hospital for an annual sleep study. I have sleep apnea and have been using a BiPAP (Bi-level Positive Air Pressure) machine for over 4 years. Every year they do a study to determine my new pressure settings. I hate it but if I don't get my settings adjusted I eventually feel all sluggish and sleepy during the day from lack of quality sleep at night. Anyway here are 13 things I hate about having the sleep study done.
- Time. I have to arrive at 8:00 pm and stay all night. I have a million things I could do instead of staying at the hospital.
- Packing. I have to pack three bags. One for my clothes, one for my BiPAP machine and one just to carry all my meds.
- Leaving the Kids. My nieces and nephews that live with me don't have a very stable situation. Any time there is any kind of interruption in the routine they have a hard time recovering. They like me being there for them as much as I like being there for them.
- The Hospital. Don't get me wrong, AGMC is a top notch medical facility and should ever I need one that is where I'm going. In fact I have gone there on several occasions when I needed emergency treatment. But I have never needed to stay overnight and I hate staying overnight.
- Parking. Always a hassle no matter when you go to the hospital. Why is it now hospitals have valet parking like it is some kind of service to visitors and patients?
- Admitting. Actually admitting is pretty much hassle free for these things but I'm in a mood to complain
- Lousy Staff. I have a complaint about only one person and it happened during the first or second study I had. The woman came into my room all sweetness and light and I was watching Diagnosis Murder. It had 20 minutes left to catch the killer. She asks me, "Are you ready to go to sleep or do need some more time?" I say "I'd like to see the end of this." She snaps at me "Well this is suppose to be a sleep study so you should go to sleep." Oh she is so lucky I left my titanium cluebat at home.
- Electrodes. Or whatever those wires are that they use. They scrub the skin with an abrasive. Then use what feels like fast drying cement to attach the leads to my scull, chest and legs. The process takes about half an hour to get me hooked up.
- Downtime. After they have hooked me up they tell you to relax until bed time which is usually 10:00. The thing is I really don't have enough time to do anything constructive in the 30 to 45 minute before I am forced to go to bed.
- Using the Bathroom at Night. I have to ring the tech and they have to unhook me so I can go to the bathroom. This can be several times if my diuretics act up. It is a major hassle but I guess I am lucky I don't have to use a bed pan.
- Bad Night's Sleep. I can normally fall asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow. Of course that is not true at the hospital. I lay in that miserable bed wired trying to relax. But I know that they are watching me, listening to me snore, and monitoring my leg movements.
- Interruptions. There are times that things will come loose while I sleep and I wake up staring at some stranger (shift changes while I sleep) who is trying to stick a wire somewhere. I have been startled to the point of almost jumping out of bed. Makes for interesting heart readings I guess.
- Clean Up. In the morning They give you a wash cloth and expect you to clean all the cement out of your hair and off your body while standing at a sink. Fortunately they use that wonderful Provon Medical Soap from the makers of Purell. (Buy it, I want to stay employed.)
UPDATE: The rest of the list is below the fold. Go to the end of the post and click "We want to read more!"
My sleep study is a necessary evil or I would have nothing to do with it. I usually get up at 5:30 and have the free (yeah like my insurance isn't being overcharged for that tiny box of Cheerios and a couple of bananas) breakfast. And I am home by 6:15. Then I promptly climb into my own bed and sleep soundly until my alarm goes off at 8:30.
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