Headlines

I couldn't resist. So here is another installment of headlines.

Colorado Man Resuscitates Chicken
Give Successful mouth-to-mouth despite chicken's lack of lips

Denny's apologizes for insult to border agent
Goes in for sandwich and gets a grand slam instead.

Woman's lover lived in closet
Finally outed by liberal media and bloggers.

B.B. King Monument to Be Built in Arkansas
Aging Blues man says "Don't need one, not dead yet."

Polo Resolves Software 'Glitch'
Virtual horses no longer throw off cyber riders.

Judges: Feds Can Put Feeding Tube in Cuban
Courts wish to starve helpless American women only.

Gay Catholics Don't Expect Vatican Change
Queer priests declare "It won't happen for us, but maybe one day for our children"

And there you have it.