Oh My Aching Blog

I am not dead. Just thought I would let you know.  I have been busy with real life stuff.  The economy is affecting lots of people I know and not in a happy good way. Worst of all, lots of highly intelligent, sober individuals plan to vote for Obama. I can barely stomach the thought of President Obama.  So that in a nutshell is the source of my malaise. So in no particular order here are some things that have been weighing on my mind.

The Ohio Election
How can an obvious partisan political hack like Ohio SoS Jennifer Brunner get away with a blatant attempt to undermine the voting process. Remember her "Vote Early" plan allowed anyone to both register and vote on the same day during the last week of September, before identities could be verified. Opponents filed a suit and a judge ruled that her plan did not give the state sufficient time to validate the registrations and would be prone to fraud. Brunner appealed and the ruling was overturned by, not surprisingly, a Clinton appointed judge. 

I don't think there will be mass voter fraud at the Ohio polls next week, but the whole process is suspect now. There has already been numerous charges of fraud and what do you do when the person who is suppose to oversee the process is the one who allowed it to be abused in the first place?

Baseball
I guess if you are a fan the fact that the Rays made it to the Series is exciting. Not so exciting that they lost to the Phillies. But I am not a fan.

I Hear Dead People
I downloaded Issac Hayes's cover of "By The Time I Get To Phoenix" from emusic.com . It is every bit as good as I remember it from being a kid.  Interestingly, Hayes stiffed his church. The Church of Scientology got zip from him in his will. Given that they are all about the money, I wonder if they are going after some of his estate.

Eureka
What's up with the short season of Eureka? What's up with Sci-fi doing these 13 episode seasons?  What will I watch when SG-A goes off the air?

Sick Friends
Pray for my friends who are sick. Some of them very so. Especially Dave.  He isn't doing well. Here is a recent photo. I may have had to adjust it a little.



I don't want to catch what he's got. Okay maybe I adjusted it a lot. I just wanted to graphically portray just how sick he was. And before you say anything; I am not sick, I am just disturbed. (BTW this is just a little inside joke between me and Dave).

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While I Was Away

Ever have one of those periods where no matter what you did things just continued to colapse? Or every time you took two steps forward you were forced one step back? Me too. And it started for me around the end of June and continues still.  I won't bore you with my whiny details, I'll just say that I had little desire to do anything but sleep.  Well I see a light at the end of the tunnel, and every fiber of my being tells me it is an oncoming train. Oh well. bottom line is I have gotten some energy back and I am fighting the malaise that had crippled me. So I am posting again. Yea me!

So what has been going on? Well Obama has been flip flopping like a Kerryfish out of water. First he will debate, now he won't. First he won't go to Iraq, then he went with the entire MSM in tow. First he found comments made by Bernie Mac offensive, then he didn't but then he sent a messenger around to say that he really did. It must have been the Angel of Death because Bernie died shortly after the Obamassiah expressed his disapproval.  I can't help but wonder if Barack also disapproved of Issac Hayes or maybe his messenger just made a pit stop in Memphis on the way back. Xenu rest his soul.

McCain has been gaining in the polls, or more precisely, Obama is slipping. I don't think John is doing much of anything and is improving. That scary fact is very revealing about this up coming election. Ennui abounds and no one seems concerned about little things like "issues". 

Meanwhile the Democrat led congress has reached it's lowest approval rating in history. 9%. Wow. I know a number of Americans, myself included, had to cancel vacation plans this year due to runaway gas prices and skyrocketing costs. I guess while they were staying around the house they took a good hard look at the job Pelosi and company's been doing and were not impressed. 

I think the choices for veep will be important. Hillary has said she did not want to be nominated but who really believes that? Of course her chances were slim and none. Barack has more sense than that. Standing between Hillary and the Presidency, he might as well have just painted a big bullseye on his back and just waited for her to plow through him to get to the oval office.  And you thought hunting with Dick Cheny was dangerous. 

Well the Olympics arrived and the U.S. leads in total medals by a slim margin over China. Though China has almost twice as many gold medals as the U.S.  I am glad for Mike Phelps though! Way to represent Mike! And I loved the interview with Mark Spitz. What a gracious athlete. Of course the old joke has to be put to rest now. You know the one, "How do you fill an Olympic Pool? Mark Spitz."  I guess some things you need to let go of.

I am looking forward to the conventions and I am sure I will have things to say about both of them.  So come back and hopefully I can keep the non-blogging blues at bay.

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Thursday Thirteen #80

13 Things About Dane Bramage
13 Memorial Day Memories

I had a wonderful Memorial Day so I thought I would share 13 highlights with you;

1. Sleeping In All the way to 10:00. A pleasure I only get on holidays.


2. Long Hot Shower The kids never sleep in so they were up at dawn's crack and long gone to terrorize the neighborhood by the time I got to the shower. Plenty of hot water and no rushing to be late for work.


3. Blogging I am terrible about blogging on holidays especially ones that fall on Saturday or Sunday. I made an effort this year to post about Memorial Day. Especially after the great sermon Pastor preached Sunday morning about remembering.


4. Rush to the Store The new Sav-A-Lot to get hot dog and hamburger buns. Plus I was having severe Coca Cola withdrawal symptoms.


5. The Invitation A friend from church called and invited me to join him and his family at Progressive Field to watch the Cleveland Indians play. He had special tickets good for extra innings.


6. The Preparation My step-dad had barbecued all day Sunday. My niece had been cooking Sunday and since 5:00am on Monday. She has announced that there will never bee another holiday cookout that she will be in charge of.


7. The Meal There was steaks, pork chops, spare ribs, hamburgers, hot dogs, collard greens, macaroni and cheese, baked beans, potato salad, pop, and cake.


8. Nuclear Destruction of My Enemies I played a relaxing game of Supreme Commander which has more nuclear explosions than any computer game ever made.


9. Rush to the Store The new Sav-A-Lot to get paper towels, paper napkins, and more charcoal before "they" arrived.


10. The Family Faceless Hordes that Descended Like Locusts Upon My Home Oh they started coming and they just kept coming and coming and coming. Arrrgh!


11. Hasty Retreat to the Environs of Garfield Heights With my exit strategy announced in advanced I drove off to where my friend and his family lives. From there it was just a quick 15 minute trip to downtown Cleveland and Progressive Field. Well a 30 minute trip since we had to turn around and go back and get the tickets that were still on the computer desk in his den.


12. An Exciting Sports Spectacle Eleven innings of nail biting excitement as the Tribe led the game, let Chicago tie, then lost spectacularly in the twelfth inning by THREE runs. At least there were fireworks.


13. Returning Home After Midnight I arrived to a quiet house, kids asleep. Good thing I had set aside a couple of pork chops and a burger, some mac and cheese and potato salad, because there was not a drop of food left in the pans. I resisted buying food at the stadium even though it was "Dollar Dog Night" and Sugardale sold over 37,000 hot dogs. I knew there would be a big plate of seconds for me carefully hidden in my office.

I had a great holiday which actually started Friday when I took an extra day off from work. We had a great Saturday preparing things and Sunday services were awesome! And I did take time to think about the men and women who sacrificed their lives so I could enjoy my long weekend in the greatest country on Earth! How was your holiday?

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Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

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Testimony

When I imagined myself as the first black man to run for President, I always considered my Christian testimony and the part my pastor would play in it. I could not think of kicking him to the curb or ignoring my association with him. As a fundamental Baptist preacher he is prone to say controversial things from the pulpit. Controversial to the ears of the world but not to God. The world might think it hateful when he preaches on sanctification and separation especially when he says to remain separate from worldly influences. My pastor always preaches the Word. If he talks about political issues, it is from a spiritual point of view and based on scripture, not personal opinion. My political views are shaped by my faith and my faith is shaped by the preaching and teaching of God’s Word and God’s Word is presented by my preacher. It was his ministry that led me to Christ and it was under his ministry that I grew as a Christian. So I cannot conceive of any time or situation where I would distance myself from him or his teachings and comments.

Well I probably won’t ever run for President but Obama is trying hard to. So I wonder about what his testimony is. He obviously embraced his pastor and his teachings at one point. But now he is putting as much distance as he can between himself and Reverend Wright. Why? Does he or doesn’t he believe the man? Is Wright Obama’s spiritual leader or isn’t he? If not then who? Shouldn’t we get to know who is the spiritual guidance of one of America’s potential Presidents?

But if Wright is Obama’s guru then aren’t we within our right to question comments the man has made publicly? Shouldn’t we be aware of what was taught by Wright and received by Obama? Isn’t this part of Barack Obama’s testimony?

Wright is in the news again, making comments against Fox News personalities. He was at a funeral of all places. I think he likes the spotlight and plans to take full advantage of his fifteen minutes. Where does that leave the Obama campaign?

Has your pastor (or other spiritual leader) said controversial things behind the pulpit? If you were running for public office, would you promote your pastor, or distance yourself?

Happy Blogoversary to Me

Wow it is hard to believe that I have been at this blogging thing for 3 years! This past year had a few gaps in it where the real world had overwhelmed me and I didn't blog. But all in all I stuck to it. I have friends who can't hold a job for as long as I have been blogging.

So thank yous are in order. First I want to thank The Lord for health and clarity of mind to be able to put two coherent thoughts together on a page.  Second I would like to thank the real world friends who read and support my blogging. The two of you know who you are.(Maybe 2008 should be the year YOU start a blog). I want to thank my fellow bloggers who stop in and leave words of encouragement. I want to thank my faithful readers. And I want to thank all the fine folks who stop in on Thursdays.

As far as changes go, I have pretty much implemented everything I wanted at the beginning of the year as far as template changes go.  I still plan to uupgrade to Blogger 2.0 version of the template as soon as learn how to write a web service and build a widget.  It may seem that I have cut back on the number of quizzes and memes that I participate in but in actuality I just post them on a different blog.

I do have a domain, danebramage.net which I may  move my blog to. Again it all depends on how much the real world demands my time.

Well I am kind of looking forward to the upcoming year. So if nothing major happens in real life I plan to keep blogging.

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Speaking of Race Relations

An interesting thing just happened to me. I walked across the street to the little deli and ordered lunch. They fixed it up for me (although I wonder sometimes how much mayonnaise they would normally put on a sandwich. I ask for light mayo and they still apply a spatula full on a six inch sub). I decided to use my bank card and the lady rang it up and printed the receipt for my signature.

"Just put your John Henry right here" she said.

John Henry? I know he was a steel driving man but I didn't know he was associated with signatures like John Hancock. Maybe white people put their John Hancocks on documents and black people put on their John Henrys.

Now the difference between me and a liberal race baiter is that I found the whole thing interesting and a little amusing. A liberal would have been offended. They might have even sued for damages seeing how they have been treated so differently!

Too Tired

I had a big post idea that I was going to write tonight but my anti-virus kept giving me problems and I was literally online with tech support for almost two hours. My technician did not have mastery over the english language and when things got off script, he (she? Couldn't tell by the name) didn't improvise well. That soul draining experience has left me unable to finish my post. Hopefully my muse will return tomorrow after some rest.

On a different note. I apologize to my Thursday Thirteen friends. I dropped a ">" off a tag and it kept the comment line from being visible against the white background. Thanks to Karina for mentioning it and thanks to all who "felt it out" to leave a comment. You went above and beyond.

Thursday Thirteen #72

13 Things About Dane Bramage
13 Answers to the Photo Meme

This was kind of fun. Type the answers to these questions into Google Images and select one image from the first page of results.

1. Age at next birthday
   
   LSD 49 is the Harper's Ferry. LSD stands for dock landing ship. I guess the order of the letters isn't important.


2. Place I'd like to travel
   
   St. Thomas looks pretty cool. Besides I couldn't find any pictures of mars I liked.


3. Favorite place
   
   There's no place like it!


4. Favorite objects
   
   Boardgames are a great hobby and I love playing. I even go out of town to conventions to play.


5. Favorite food
   
   It is no secret that I could subsist on nothing but chicken seven days a week. Fried has got to be my favorite way of having it.


6. Nickname
   
   Just Kev.


7. Place you were born
   
   Not exactly a recognizable skyline but I was born in the Rubber Capital of the World. Akron Ohio, also known for the American Soap Box Derby.


8. Town you live in
   
   From the same page of images, since I live in the place I was born, here is Lebron James' high school jersey. Those colors are for St. Vincent-St. Marys, a couple blocks from here.


9. Your middle name
   
   Despite the controversy surrounding my middle name I have decided to go with what's on the birth certificate; Jessio.


10. Your last name
    
    OMG! Cady left ATWT!


11. First job
    
    And basically the only job since 1984


12. Bad Habit
    
    It might be procrastination; or it could be
    
    


13. Grandmother's name
    
    My maternal grandmother was Leoda. Leonardo Da Vinci drew this picture. Not of my grandmother mind you.

There's thirteen for you. I have more. If you want to know my favorite color and favorite book and photo answers to eight more questions check out I Blog The Body Electric

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Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Global Warming

Well we've been cleaning up the mess from the worse snowstorm some say we've had in 25 years. I was stranded at home from Friday afternoon until Sunday morning when I went to church. Yes I went to church. The roads were a mess and still hadn't been cleared and I went to church. Of course the Lord has blessed me with an all wheel drive vehicle but the church van which I operated and picked up kids in was old school rear wheel drive. I did get stuck once but I manage to get free.

Now I make a big deal about this because of one thing. There are so called Christians out there who attend churches who decided to close because of the weather. How do you justify closing church? What happened to "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me"? Dozens of churches in N E Ohio were closed. I guess some only serve Christ when it's convenient. Can you image what would happen if Christians in this country were persecuted for their beliefs like Christians in Islamic nations? I doubt if they would make a stand. They can't even get to church on a snowy day.

Quick Thoughts

The Election

I was sad to see John Edwards drop put of the race. No, I don't think he had any chance of winning nor do I think that anything he stands for is of any value. I liked him in the race because he was cute and cuddly and people who like that sort of thing in politics would have voted for him. Every vote for him was a vote NOT for Hilary.

 

Dennis Kucinich is quickly (but far too late) becoming a non-entity. I saw a campaign ad for his congressional opponent which took Dennis the Menace to task for his absenteeism in congress. DK has a hard re-election fight ahead.

 

On the republican side Fred Thompson and Rudy Giuliani have exited the arena. So much for star power. Sure both men had real political credentials but I don't think they were banking on those to get the nomination.

 

Now I am really in a bind. It looks like McCain may get the nomination. Romney's still a contender but I do not like either of them.  It will be interesting to see the results of Super Tuesday.

 

The Super Bowl

Who was playing anyway? Seriously. I am so out of touch with football I didn't know who was playing until somebody mentioned it Sunday night. I'm sure the Patriots' heartache was compounded by everything they lost in the last couple minutes of the game. C'est la vie. I am in the middle of watching all the Super bowl commercials on the web though. I never miss them (except when they originally air that is.)

 

 

Blog Template

I have been playing with my template even more. You won't notice (unless you go to Bramage Report) because It looks the same as it does now. I am trying to upgrade to a Blogger 2 type of template and keep all the functionality I currently have. There are some major road bumps:

□        The comics will not display (except for Day by Day). The reason is the new Blogger template uses an XML parser and the JavaScript code I use to format the URL is rejected. There is no getting around this. I understand there are some workarounds but nothing quick and easy like the document.write statement I currently use.  If you know of a quick way to fix it I will be very appreciative of your help.

□        Haloscan Comments. This may be a non-issue since most people have been using the Blogger comments since I turned them on.  I know there is w way to get them to work with the new template. I just haven't worked out whether I want to keep them yet.

□        Testing. My HTML editor does not display the new Blogger template. So testing the code, CSS and widgets gets difficult. Fortunately I have an extra Blogger blog or two to try things out.

 

On the upside Blogger is very helpful with instruction on how to code in the new template.

 

Personal Note

I was in the hospital last Thursday for outpatient surgery. Everything went well but I won't know the results for a couple weeks. I appreciate the prayers and apologize for not posting very much during my recovery.  All I have been able to do lately is sleep and play SupCom FA.  

NOTE: This post was via email and for some reason between MS Outlook and Blogger the spaces between sections has grown tremendously. Another blog related item to work on.

Tonight is Christmas Eve

My little countdown widget declares that tonight is Christmas Eve. I was fortunate enough to have today off. Many people had to work. I usually take this time to contact my friends and wish them a Merry Christmas. Tomorrow I will spend the day with family.

I would like to wish all the readers who visit me a Merry Christmas. I know that isn't P.C. But if you have read just a little of my blog you know I am not a P.C. person. So in that spirit I would also like express my wish that everyone know Jesus.

Jesus Christ is the reason for the season. The reason everyone is peaceful and joyful this time of year is because they know that the promised Saviour came to Earth and dwelt among us. Oh and He will return as promised too.

If you would like to know Jesus and be 100% sure you will go to Heaven when you die, read this. And again Merry Christmas!

Random Acts of Memeness

The Random Yak has tagged me with a meme. My meme policy is to only participate if I feel like it or if the person who tagged you is really cool. Likewise when I tag someone I let them know they are under no obligation in my eyes to participate.
The rules of the meme:

• When tagged, you must link to the person who tagged you (RandomYak).
• Then post the rules before your list, (that'd be this thing here) and list eight random things about yourself.
• At the end of the post, you must tag and link to eight other people.

So this is the Random Eight Meme. I pick eight random things about me to share. I am not quite sure how that works. Should I take everything about me and put it in a hat and draw out eight? Yeah let's do just that.

• Thing #238 I am participating in the NaNoWriMo this year. My NaNoWriMo name is Kevlord. I am writing a science fiction novel and I am pleased as punch with my progress so far. I am also certain that my novel is crap. I am very pleased about that too, believe it or not. It's all about the learning experience.


• Thing #2 Currently I live alone in my own home. The "People Under The Stairs" are gone. Can anyone tell me the best way to clean dried cat crap off a cement floor? Or where to find those scrub brushes with long handles? And I think I need a floor squigee. And a respirator.


• Thing #446 I have been dreaming about dead people Weird. For several nights I have been dreaming about relatives and friends who are all dead. Do I need a shrink or a psychic?


• Thing #37 This is National Games Week Me and a bunch of my gamer friends are all going to get together Friday and play games for 12 hours. At least those of us with the day off. The rest will probably show up after five. We rented a pavilion and plan to consume Thanksgiving leftovers. Stop by if you are in West Akron near Sand Run Metro Park, Shady Hollow Pavilion. Bring food and games.


• Thing #7 I am singing "Birthday For A King" as a solo in church. Again. I sang it last year too. I must get a new song by Christmas 2008.


• Thing #879 I am oddly fascinated by the anime "Bleach". I don't know why. I've been TiVo'ing it for two weeks now and I am actually looking forward to each episode. I puts me in mind of early Dragon Ball Z and I hated DBZ.


• Thing #42 I have been a Bus Captain at church for 12 years. That makes me the longest serving Bus Captain. I am really sad that everyone who was a Bus Captain when I started are out of that ministry now. (although some have move on to different ministries).


• Thing #89 When I turn 50 years old in 2009, I'll celebrate with a Sci-Fi Masque Planning it now. Come as your favorite Sci-Fi or Superhero character. I am looking forward to that and with this much advanced planning how can it not be great?

Now, for the tagees, I choose;

1. Eddie at EddieButler.com


2. JAM at Least Significant Bits


3. Chelle Y at The Story of Me


4. Mitchypoo at Knitting and Losing


5. QTPies7 at My Seven QTPies


6. Nicholas at A Gentleman's Domain


7. Malcolm at Pop Culture Dish


8. Darla at nichtszusagen

Well I hope you all enjoyed this memey goodness!

Thursday Thirteen #56

13 Things About Dane Bramage
13 Types of People Who Get On My Nerves

I generally love everybody but sometimes there are certain types of people who get on my nerves in a big way. My nerves have been acutely raw because of some of them recently.

1. People Who Can't Keep Their Promises As a Christian Bus Captain I see this every week when I visit my kids. Their parents swear that the kids are coming and will be ready. But lo and behold come Sunday morning the kids aren't going. The parents don't even bother coming to the door to tell me they aren't coming.


2. People Who Make Excuses for Their Shortcomings "I was going to do it but the weather wasn't good enough". When the weather breaks, "Oh I need a special tool". etc..


3. People Who Make Excuses for Other Peoples Shortcomings "Well he would have done it but he has been so sick lately." Yeah watching the weather and looking for tools can really wear you down.


4. Unreliable People What is it with the world today. It used to be when someone said they were going to do something they did it. Today people tell you they are going to do something and it is "understood" that they are exempt from completing their task if something better, more important, easier, pays more, comes along. When it does they usually become a #2 person.


5. People Who Think You Are Stupid Ever have someone make such an outrageously stupid and/or false statement and look at you in all seriousness expecting you to believe it?


6. Fence Walkers Ever try to get someone to commit one way or another on an issue and all they do is give you excuses on why they can't decide?


7. Liars All liars are fryers. I have no use for someone who deliberately tells me a falsehood. And no I don't buy it when they try to excuse it with "I changed my mind."


8. Busybodies I only have one such neighbor and I try to be loving and kind but she is constantly calling city and county agencies on me. She has a problem that requires a 12 step program to fix but she wont go go go.


9. People Who Do Things For The Common Good(As They See It)
   
   


10. Thieves And I don't mean the old Dungeons and Dragons character class (although they do make great pit detectors). I hate people who just take things or worse, people who feel entitled to your things because they don't have it as good as you.


11. Liberal Democrats Redundant I know. They were covered under liars and thieves.


12. Hypocrites Whether they are celebrity spokesmen who don't live their beliefs, or former politicians who blatantly contribute to the problems they are crusading to solve, hypocrites really rub me the wrong way.


13. Celebrity Know-It-Alls Just because someone made a movie or won an Oscar doesn't make them an expert on anything else. If they want to stop global warming they can start by shutting up.

There I feel much better now! If you have a particular type of person, or a specific person you don't like right now, tell us in the comments. Note:It is not really possible to read a person's mind. Any celebrity images with thought bubbles were created for parody and ridicule of said celebrity.)

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Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

No Dominoes Pizza Tonight

Steve over at The Sneeze posted about the ability to order Dominoes pizza online.

Regardless of your feelings about Domino's, the fact that you can order it online without having to talk to a human being is fantastic.

Type a little on your computer and magically a pizza shows up at your door. It's the closest thing we have to Star Trek's food synthesizer. Only it takes about 25 minutes to work. And the food delivery unit at my Domino's has a bad mustache.

I was all set to order a pizza. I went to their site and attempted to register and was told that the store that services my area does not yet accept online orders. I am crushed. I have half a mind to call them up and ask them what their problem is. Why are they so far behind the technology curve?!

Tonight was going to be a Blockbuster night(I rarely go to blockbuster anymore but I still call a night of home movie watching a blockbuster night). Pizza goes great with DVD watching. Alas I guess it was not meant to be.


Oh BTW I have been ordering Papa Johns Pizza online for two years.

Thursday Thirteen #50

13 Things About Dane Bramage

13 Tortures for Women Whom I've Dated Because I'm NOT Bitter

Once upon a time, say fourteen and a half months ago I did my second Thursday Thirteen which was A List of 13 Lists of 13 Things in honor of the fact that that particular Thursday Thirteen was on the 13th of July. I had not planned to do most of the lists on that list but looking back I thought that some of them would actually make good lists. Well in keeping with the dark mood I have had of late and an inability to let go of the past, I have decided to do my torture list. These tortures are the results of real life dating situations. Oh sure the 13 Women Who Could Walk Barefoot Over My Face list would have been much more enjoyable but this list has to be done. Now I realize that most of the readers of Thursday Thirteen are women. So let me just say up front that I am not purposely trying to antagonize you. But if you find yourself listed as an offender then the corresponding torture is for you. Now these tortures are not the result of a single woman but from several whom I dated over the last seven years. Enjoy.

1. Endless Date Torture I can't recall all of the times when I was told, "Oh this will just be an hour". Well the torture has the woman sitting through a boring situation for an hour. Only the clock runs slow, like 10 minutes for every 1 minute the clock shows.


2. Does This Make Me Look Fat Torture Why do women even ask men this question? The torture is that the woman has a rack of her favorite designer fashions but all the mirrors are carnival funhouse mirrors which add a lot of extra junk in the trunk. (as if some women needed it). For double fun tell her to just try on clothes for an hour and add the Endless Date Torture.


3. Drop Everything Torture Some women are so needy. I had tried to do things either for work, or family only to have the phone ring. Then I had to drop everything to deal with the situation. Well this torture has the woman fitted with a cell phone that vibrates so hard her teeth rattle. Then she is given a simple task of stacking fragile objects and carrying them from on table to another. Only half way through the phone rings forcing her to drop everything and eventually start over. I know it is cruel but she only has to do it for, say an hour?(snicker)


4. Read My Mind Torture "You should have known that I wanted you to be there!" That was an actual quote from an ex-girlfriend. This torture has robots arm with little titanium clue bats bopping the woman on the head. To stop it the woman need only telepathically project her desire for the robots to cease. The torture continues until the robot successfully reads her mind or for an hour. Man am I evil!


5. Peacock on Display Torture I have never been ashamed of any woman I dated. I have never dated an ugly woman. At the same time I have never grabbed a woman and dragged her to all of my friends houses to show her off. This torture has the woman standing in a display window being introduced to everyone who passes by. Again only for an hour. Hehe.


6. Do What I Want Not What I Say Torture I had a woman tell me to do one thing but she actually wanted me to do something completely different. Then she was mad at me for doing what she told me to do. This torture is simple. Pop-up heads bark out an order. As soon as the woman does what she is told she is given an electric jolt. This continues until she figures out what the pop-up head really wants or for, well, you know.


7. Previous Ex Torture Despite what you may gather from this list not all my relationships ended badly. I am on friendly terms with many of my ex-girl friends. And that causes all kinds of trouble if I run across them with while out with the current girlfriend. Apparently I must not be over them if I don't immediately denounce them for the wicked harpy the are. This torture simply has robots dressed up as the woman's ex-boyfriends. They are all put in a room and move around randomly. Every time the woman makes contact with an ex, she gets an electrical shock.


The rest of the tortures are below the fold. Go to the end of the post and click "We want to read more!"


8. Critical Diner Torture One woman no matter where I took her to eat would order something off the menu and then proceed to alter every aspect of the item. And she would change her mind between the time she ordered and the time the food was brought. The torture here is for the woman to work as a food server. She gets bopped with a clue bat every time she gets an order wrong.


9. Eat off my Plate Torture If something looks good then order it. Don't order something different and then expect to eat my food. I am amazed at how many women think this is some cutesy couple thing. Ewww! The torture has the woman sitting at a table with an empty plate. A 12 armed robot sits across from her with a plate full of food, six knives and six forks. The woman need only feed herself from the robot's plate while avoiding the super speed knives and forks.


10. Tickle Me Torture I am ticklish. I hate being tickled. So why would you continue to do it after the first time I told you to stop? In this torture the woman is... oh to heck with it. She gets repeatedly tazed. I REALLY hate being tickled.


11. Snarky Email Torture I related a story to my date once. She took offense at something but didn't say anything. Then She flooded my inbox with snarky emails and ads for dating services. In this torture the woman is sitting a t a desk with a computer. She gets 1,000,000 pieces of spam and has to listen to the most obnoxious email arrival announcement ever created.


12. Always A Bridesmaid Torture How many weddings can a couple attend? One woman took me to weddings where even she didn't know the couple. The torture has the woman dressed as a bridesmaid and goes through ceremony after ceremony after ceremony. It ends when she finally catches the bouquet. Did I mention that her hands and feet are tied? (I really should come up with a torture for woman who I have dated and after years of silence, they have gone out of their way to get word to me that they are now married)


13. Never On Time Torture Many women talk longer to get ready than they said they would. Not a biggie. But how does a woman pick special events to attend that never start on time? An then the additional problem of it dragging on past the ending time. Admittedly this is an ethno-cultural phenomenon to which my brothers can attest. Anyway the torture is that the woman has to sit in her seat through an event but every ten minutes an announcement is made that they are waiting for another person to arrive and the show will be delayed ten minutes. Keep in mind we are using the Endless Date Torture clock.

I know many of you are thinking, "Wow Dane, no wonder your still single." And one day there will be a special torture for you. But until then I hope you have enjoyed this peek into the dark side of my psyche. I don't sit around all day dreaming up tortures for people but these have been sitting in the back of my head waiting to see daylight. I feel so much better now!

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Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It's easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!


View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Thursday Thirteen #49

13 Things About Dane Bramage

13 Answers from the 100 Question Meme
Well I thought it would be a good idea to let people get to know me a little more. So I am going to answer the first 13 questions in the "100 Questions" meme. And the next time a Wednesday rolls around and I realize I don't have a Thursday Thirteen done, I'll answer the next 13 questions!

1. ONE OF YOUR SCARS, HOW DID YOU GET IT?
   My Siamese cat Mr. Murphy bit me on the nose.


2. WHAT IS ON THE WALLS IN YOUR ROOM?
   Which room? This one has grease, dust, and splatters of undeterminable substances.


3. WHAT DOES YOUR CELL PHONE LOOK LIKE?
   Like this! DUH!


4. WHAT MUSIC DO YOU LISTEN TO?
   I have an eclectic taste in music. I like jazz, classical, R&B, gospel and some forms of rock.


5. DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN?
   I don't remember. It was kind of hectic with all the screaming and the slapping going on.


6. WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING RIGHT NOW?
   About four thousand dollars. That would catch me up with everything.


7. WHO DO YOU MISS?
   My best friend. I miss talking to him.


8. WHAT'S YOUR MIDDLE NAME?
   That is open to debate. Officially on my birth certificate it is Jessio. But it is supposed to be Jessenio according to my late father.


9. THE BEST TV SHOW EVER CREATED?
   Buffy the Vampire Slayer


10. THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO?
    Niquiesha, my niece.


11. DO YOU GET SCARED IN THE DARK?
    No.


12. THE LAST PERSON TO MAKE YOU CRY?
    My Pastor. Sometimes his sermons touch a part of my soul and the tears just flow like a river.


13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE COLOGNE/PERFUME?
    Stetson. Although I have tried some Avon colognes for men that I like but they are a bit pricey.

There you have it. Thirteen tiny glimpses into me. Although officially I answered questions 1 through 15. It appears that the two different sources I used for the questions both omitted # 8 and #9. If you know what they are suppose to be let me know.

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Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!


View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Ah Fall in Ohio

It will be officially Autumn soon and the signs are everywhere. This morning at 8:00 I left to take the kids to school and had to run the heater/defrost in my car. At 9:00 I left for work and had to run the air conditioner.

I guess another sign of late summer early fall are these beauties which I captured with my camera phone.





These Hibiscus Syriacus have volunteered themselves into my yard. The Rose of Sharon as it is also called blooms in late summer with these large flowers. The plant depicted in the first picture was murdered by my neighbor. For no reason whatsoever she pulled it and trashed it one morning. She didn't say anything about it. I just notice it laying in my driveway amongst the weedy debris of her garden as I was going to work. I seem to be surrounded by nutjobs.

I Voted Today- NOT!

For the last month or so there have been reminders all over town to "REMEMBER TO VOTE ON SEPTEMBER 11TH". Well I remembered and went to the polling place this morning. I showed my proper I.D. I was a amazed at the huge notice declaring that poll workers would not ask for positive proof of citizenship. Made me wonder how many illegals were voting. But that's a subject for another post. I was all set to cast my ballot when the worker looked at me and said;

Sir, you are registered as a Republican. This is a Democratic election. You can still vote if you want to but you have to change your party affiliation.

Ha! Nice try comrade. Okay I should have known something was up it being only September but I wasn't sure if there were some special issues that needed addressed or what. I wanted to be safe rather than sorry. Besides you think with all the bazillion reminder signs about voting today, at least one would have mentioned Democrats Only.
I plead insanity. My life has been crazy and I thought it would be over by now (my situation not my life) but the drama continues.

Thursday Thirteen #47

13 Things About Dane Bramage

13 Things Going On Around Me
Well if you thought I was dead you were wrong. I have been preoccupied. My life is in major flux at the moment. Here are 13 reasons why:

1. My niece and her kids moved out in April. She got a job and wanted to get her own place. I think it was too soon and I was right.


2. My niece got laid off. And she gave up her apartment and moved in with my sister (her mom).


3. My sister is losing her house. She has to be out by September. My niece wants to move back in with me but can't. I have remodeled the upstairs.


4. The "People Under the Stairs" have to be out by October 1st. No one is happy with this situation. But 2 years is enough.


5. Dave had another hospital stay. Pancreatitis flared up again and he went to emergency. A milder case this time with a shorter stay. He's home now.


6. My niece will move "Under the Stairs". Once Dave and his wife have moved, my niece will take over the basement. I don't know what she is going to do in September. She has to b out of her mom's and can't move in downstairs for another month. Meanwhile the kids, 3 this year, will have to be ferried back and forth to school from where ever she is.


7. Dave needs to move earlier. Things would work out much better (for me) if Dave were to move out 30 days earlier. I haven't approached him about it yet. He is not the most understanding of other peoples needs if they conflict with his own.


8. My mom is moving into a retirement home. She's 67 and still works (where I get my work ethic I guess) but her income is not much and she won't be able to stay where she is now. They've up her rent.


9. My homeowner niece is still unemployed. She was trying to go to school but her finances are starting to really suffer so she is looking for work to get caught up on her bills. My sister and brother-in-law may have to move in with her until they find another place of there own. No one gets along with my brother-in law for very long.


10. My vacation plans have been derailed. A new situation has arisen which will force me to cut short my vacation in August and come home early. I am not looking forward to that day.


11. Work is hell. My department is short 3 people. We now have one new drone and two contractors. My deliverables have been suffering and I don't think my performance rating this year will be half of last year.


12. Money is short. Just not enough to go around.


13. My inner "Mr. Hyde" has been surfacing too often of late. I have been told that I am grouchy, short tempered, and all mopey lately.

Well I do feel better having shared my burdens. I know these are just temporary situations and that in less than 75 days I will have a completely new set of issues. Ah life. Next week I will list the 13 blessings that have helped me through this.

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Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!


View More Thursday Thirteen Participants

Happy 4th of July

I celebrated the 4th alone (but was graciously fed by family) and now I am in the beautiful state capitol of Columbus. All the fireworks were yesterday (the 3rd- go figure) and now I am luxuriating at the Crown Plaza. Tomorrow me and 15,000 of my closest friends will fill the Greater Columbus Convention Center for the 2007 Origins Game Fair. I was in such a foul mood until I got out on the road and started down here. Now I can't remember what my snit was about. Probably a good thing. Ah the magic of room service. I may post some pics. My Thursday Thirteen was done last week in anticipation of lack of time. If I don't get to you this week it is nothing personal. Now back to vacation. A friend suggested that there may be a Lesser Columbus Convention Center. Sounds like a quest to me!